Self-Judgment – The Block To Inner Peace

There is a part that needs to be added to the topic of judgment that I didn’t discuss in the last post. Judgment of self.  Self-judgment is one aspect that has played a big part in my life. It is also a very common form of judgment and an impediment to experiencing inner peace. This is an important segment for the next age 101 concept of judgment.

We are, in many cases, our own toughest judges. Self-judgement is the root cause of a lot of imbalance within us. We love to judge our selves as good or bad or right or wrong. Whether we judge our behavior or our perceived “status” in our families or workplace or society in general, this judgement can cause inner turmoil. Mental illness and sometimes even criminal behavior can result from labeling our selves as bad people or good for nothing.

One of the most popular examples of self-judgement is one that I hear all the time. It is the judging of whether we have parental approval. This practice of measuring up to our parents expectations can carry through with people their whole life causing them endless feelings of unworthiness. This feeling then overflows into many areas of their life and can cause problems with other relationships. When we carry the feeling that we have let our parents down and haven’t turned out the way they had hoped, it can lead to escaping into self-destructive behaviors to avoid facing our judged inadequacies.

As mentioned in the previous post, judgement is not only just an illusion but it can also be destructive.

My father was the closest thing to God that I knew. He was God in my eyes. I ached for his approval in everything. I had a burning desire not to let him down. To live up to his expectations. Of course, as is usually the case in examples of this kind of self-judgement, he was totally fine with whatever I did. He loved me regardless of my behaviors or achievements and never criticized or judged. I was my harshest critic. I had a blessed childhood. I was a straight A student. Quarterback in football, Pitcher in baseball. Tops in anything I attempted. I had it all. Or so everyone told me. Everyone but myself. I knew I didn’t measure up to what my father expected of me. At 16 or 17 I escaped into all kinds of behavior that diverted me from the pressure of figuring out what my life’s work would be. I could be anything. Anything I put my mind to. That was too much pressure.

I partied for 10 years. Then I never became Prime Minister of Canada or head of a large corporation or rich and famous or anything really noteworthy. I had let my father down. I didn’t love myself. I was a failure in his eyes. Well maybe not in his eyes but definitely in mine. I didn’t love myself. I didn’t even like myself. The root was my belief that I was not worthy. That I screwed up. Self-judgement impeded my inner peace for many years. Until June 7 2000.

My father died June 7 1990. I woke up exactly 10 years later to the day. It was a personal trauma that jolted me out of my sleep. It was then I realized that I was God. That I was the creator of my own reality. My reality had been misjudged. These feelings of lack of self-esteem were groundless. The feeling that I had let him down was not reality. Sure, he was God, but so was I. He never once gave me any indication that I was anything less than perfect. It had been me judging myself for all these years.

For the first time in my life, my mind quit nagging at me. All was quiet inside. There was no internal chatter. No telling myself I was stupid or useless. I had inner peace. It is a feeling I carry to this day.

I learned later, after my Overlight training, that my primary life lesson in this lifetime  was “love.” The love of self being the main component. Self-judgment plays a big role in the mastering of this life lesson. If you have judged yourself to be unworthy or “bad” then it is impossible to love one’s self. Loving your self is necessary before you can love everyone and everything around you. One has to be love to give love. If we are full of love for our selves, then it can easily flow out to all things.

With the knowing that there is no good or bad and that we have placed these lessons in our path to enable us to remember our true self, how can we judge our selves? How can we have anything but love for our selves? When we understand that the intent of this human experiment is for the sole purpose of reflecting the presence of god within, then there can be no judgment. It is only part of the process. To feel unworthy or to judge our selves is all part of the illusions that form our present consciousness.

Judgment of any kind will be gone for humans in the next age. We all judge our selves. Imagine not doing that. The lack of a feeling of self-worth is the root cause of so many other imbalances. Take the judgment away and inner peace is yours. Do you see how these concepts all flow and blend into each other? All so beautiful in their simplicity. Freeing our selves from judgment comes easily when we grasp the big picture of how life can be like in the next age.

Related posts:

1. Judgment Is Gone In The Next Age